所以我跟卡尔说 不管他们的父母多有名 So I told Carl, nobody, no matter how famous their parents are...
没有人可以爬到恐龙上面 ...nobody is allowed to climb on the dinosaur.
但大家当然是 一耳进… But of course, this went right in one ear...
我喜欢他如此在乎事情 I love how he cares so much about stuff.
如果我眯眼看 还可以假装他是亚伦•艾达 If I squint, I can pretend he's Alan Alda.
太好了 又在讲恐龙故事 Oh, good. Another dinosaur story.
这些故事什么时候才会绝种 When are those gonna become extinct?
如果我是个可以飞行和隐形的超级英雄 If I was a superhero who could fly and be invisible...
那就太棒了 ...that would be the best.
瑞秋到底看上这家伙哪一点 What does Rachel see in this guy?
我好爱瑞秋 I love Rachel.
真希望她是我老婆 I wish she was my wife.
谁在唱歌 Who's singing?
# 没有人告诉你活着有多累 # # So no one told you life was gonna be this way #
# 上班受罪 口袋空空 爱情变累赘 # # Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A. #
# 寂寞又潦倒 受气又受累 # # It's like you're always stuck in second gear #
# 日复一日 年复一年 # # When it hasn't been your day, #
# 时运不济 活着受罪 # # your week, your month, or even your year #
# 你我永不离弃 # # but I'll be there for you #
# 纵有狂风暴雨 # # When the rain starts to pour #
# 你我永不离弃 # # I'll be there for you #
# 支持一如往昔 # # Like I've been there before #
# 你我永不离弃 # # I'll be there for you #
# 你我相偎相依 # # 'Cause you're there for me too #
嘿 你们小时候 玩"快乐时光"扮家家酒时… Hey, when you guys were kids and you played Happy Days...
- 都扮演谁我都演瑞奇 - 我是琼妮 ...who were you? I was always Richie. - I was always Joanie.
问题 "丢鸡蛋砸盖勒家" 是你街坊的口号吗 Was, uh, "Egg the Gellers" the war cry of your neighborhood?
（床垫大王特卖）
是床垫大王 Ew, ew! It's the Mattress King.
不要看 快点转台 Don't look. Change the channel.
等等 我想看 我跟他离婚后… Wait. I want to see this. After I divorce him...
半个王国都会是我的 ...half of that kingdom is gonna be mine.
陈列室是如此地绝望 Despair fills the mattress showroom.
我的王国突然间少了皇后 My kingdom is suddenly without a queen.
我超沮丧的… I'm so depressed...
我要大砍… ...I'm going to slash...
我的售价 快来选购 ...my prices! Check it out!
加州特大床垫599元 舒适层加大床垫499元 599 for a California king. 499 for a pillow-top queen set.
我的价钱超中世纪的 I'm going medieval on prices.
真是低贱 What a wank.
我无法相信他利用我们的离婚来卖床垫 Oh, I cannot believe he's using our divorce to sell mattresses.
就是啊 舒适层加大床垫499元 谁还管离婚啊 I know. At 499 for a pillow-top queen, who cares about the divorce?
它们一定卖得出去 Those babies will sell themselves.
而且我为你感到惊骇 And I'm appalled for you, by the way.
我的卖场很近 我很便宜 我是国王 I'm close. I'm cheap. I'm the king.
好 爸 我们明晚再见了 拜拜 Okay. Okay, Daddy. We'll see you tomorrow night. Okay, bye-bye.
我们 "We"?
明天要跟我爸吃晚餐 希望没关系 - Are, uh, having dinner with my dad tomorrow night. I hope that's okay.
糟糕 明天不太行 Oh, shoot. Tomorrow's not good.
我应该要从帝国大厦跳下来 I'm supposed to, um, fall off the Empire State Building...
掉在一个没有坐垫的脚踏车上面… ...and land on a bicycle with no seat, so...
罗斯 我爸不讨厌你 Ross, my father doesn't hate you.
少来 他说我是"油头" Please. He refers to me as "Wet-Head."
亲爱的 他都用绰号称呼别人 Honey, he calls everybody by a nickname.
听着 一顿晚餐就好 为了我就一晚 好吗 Okay, look, I know. Just one dinner. Please, one night. For me. Please?
我只希望他像我一样爱你 I just want him to love you like I do.
好吧 不全然一样 All right. Well, not exactly like I do.
但如果你来吃晚餐… But if you do come to dinner...
我会穿着你喜欢的那件黑色衣服爱你 ...I'll love you like I do in that black thing that you like.
我愿意去 I'll go.
- 好吧 - 谢谢 - Fine. - Thank you.
你好 阿甘 Hi, Gunther.
是啊 再说吧 Yeah. We'll see.
- 嘿 大家 - 嘿 - Hey, you guys. - Hey.
- 嘿 - 你们猜怎么着 - Hey. Hey. - Guess what.
- 我有头路了 - 太好了 - I got a gig. - Great.
看吧 我就是不能当演员 因为我说不出"头路" See, that's why I can never be an actor. Because I can't say "gig."
对啊 我也说不出"可颂" 天啊 Yeah, I can't say "croissant." Oh, my God.
- 什么角色 - 不是角色 - What's the part? - It's not a part. No.
我在学习中心教人如何演肥皂剧 I'm teaching Acting for Soap Operas at the Learning Extension.
太棒了 Come on. That's great.
这是我的机会回馈… It's like my chance to give something back...
演艺圈 ...to the acting community.
你大概不能和你的学生们上床 You know, you're probably not allowed to sleep with any of your students.
我知道 I know.
（床垫中心 床垫大王）
我不知道耶 摩妮卡 光是来这里感觉就很奇怪 Ugh. I don't know, Monica. It feels funny just being here.
如果你跟珍妮丝的前夫买床垫… I mean, if you buy a bed from Janice's ex-husband...
就跟背叛钱德没两样 ...that's like betraying Chandler.
价钱太好了 Not at these prices.
你好 Hi.
你知道吗 如果在英国 这辆车就会在店的另外一边 You know, in England this car would be on the other side of the store.
（大折扣中）
（超棒床垫）
菲比 快过来 Phoebe, come here.
这就是我的新床 Ah, this is my new bed.
你一定得躺躺看 You gotta feel this bad boy.
摩妮卡 感觉还是很怪 Ugh. Monica, it still feels so weird, you know?
钱德是你的朋友 Chandler's your friend. Oh.
天啊 Oh, my God.
好吧 买这张床 你可以交别的朋友 Oh. All right, take this bed. You can make other friends. Oh.
（乔瑟夫•崔比亚尼）
晚安 Good evening.
我是崔比亚尼先生 I am Mr. Tribbiani.
我要教大家如何演肥皂剧 And I will be teaching Acting for Soap Operas.
好吧… Now, um...
我在"我们的日子" 饰演德瑞克•雷莫端医生的第一天… ...on my first day as Dr. Drake Ramoray on Days of our Lives...
我学到在肥皂剧中 ...uh, ahem, I learned that one of the most important things...
最重要的一件事就是反应 ...in soap opera acting is reacting.
不代表再演一次 This does not mean acting again.
这代表你没有台词 而是别人刚讲完 It means you don't have a line, but someone else just did.
就像这样 And it goes something like this. Ahem.
谢了… Thanks. Thanks. Thanks a lot.
还有 在我忘记之前 要演肥皂剧… By the way, before I forget. To work in soap operas...
你们有些人得变得迷人一点 ...some of you are gonna have to become much more attractive.
好 继续吧… All right, moving right along...
- 嗨 - 嘿 - Hi. - Hey.
- 昨晚教得如何 - 超棒的 可以说些很棒的话 - Oh! How was teaching last night? - Oh, it was great. You get to say stuff like:
"钟声不能让你下课 我才可以" "Hey, the bell doesn't dismiss you. I dismiss you."
- 真棒 - 对啊 - Oh, nice. - Yeah.
还有 我得到 "我的孩子们"的试演机会 Oh, and guess what. I got an audition for All My Children.
很棒的一个角色 Yeah, it's this great part.
一个叫做尼克的拳击手 This boxer named Nick.
我超适合的 他跟我很像… And I'm so, so right for it, you know? He's just like me...
除了他是拳击手… ...except that he's a boxer...
而且有个邪恶的双胞胎之外 ...and has an evil twin.
来了 来了 床垫大王送货来了 Hear ye, hear ye. Delivery from the Mattress King.
你是盖勒小姐吗 You Miss Geller?
- 好啊 - 在这里签名 - Okay. - Sign here.
我有中间名吗 Ooh. Do I have a middle name?
好 摩妮卡•法鲁拉… All right. Monica Felula...
盖勒 ...Geller.
那间卧房 It's that bedroom there.
嘿 摩妮卡在床垫大王买了张床 Hey, Monica bought a bed from the Mattress King?
对 拜托千万不要跟钱德讲 Yeah. So please, please, please don't say anything to Chandler.
- 你要我对钱德撒谎 - 有问题吗 - You want me to lie to Chandler? - Is that a problem?
没有 No.
噢 拳击手尼克 来看你有什么能耐 Oh, hey, hey, Nick the boxer. Let's see what you got.
- 好 - 好 做好动作啊 - Yeah. - All right, put them up. Come on.
嘿 你还蛮行的嘛 Hey, you're pretty good at this.
对啊 我学过 我之前待过青年中心 Yeah, I had to learn. I was staying at the Y...
有些少年表现得不像基督徒 ...and some of the young men weren't acting Christian enough.
嘿 轻一点 嘿 Hey, now. Hey.
我流血了 太好了 Ow. And I'm bleeding. Okay, great.
我还吃素呢 Wow. And I'm a vegetarian.
好了 对不起 我们敷点冰块 All right, I'm sorry. We'll put some ice on it.
- 头往后 - 好 - Put your head back. Ooh. - Okay. All right.
- 我看不到 - 我抓着你 - I can't see. - I have you.
天啊 Oh, God.
盖勒小姐 要放哪间卧房 Which bedroom do you want it in, Ms. Geller?
窗户边看起来像有洁癖的那间 Oh. It's the compulsively neat one by the window, okay?
知道了 Gotcha.
嗨 老爸 Hi, Daddy.
他们把我们安排在这桌 This is where they put us?
怎么厨房没位置了吗 What? There was no table available in the kitchen?
- 我的宝贝 - 你记得罗斯吧 - Hello, baby. - You remember Ross.
很高兴再看到你 葛林医生 Nice to see you again, Dr. Green.
那么… So.
- 图书馆怎么样 - 博物馆 - How's the library? - Uh, museum.
- 图书馆怎么了 -从来都没有过图书馆 - What happened to the library? - There never was a library.
我是说到处都有图书馆 I mean, there are libraries. It's just that I, um...
但我没在任何一间工作过 I've never worked at one. Ha, ha.
你们知道这里什么好吃吗 You know what's really good here?
龙虾 The lobster.
- 你觉得怎样 直接点三只 - 好啊 如果你很饿的话 - What do you say? Shall I just order three? - Yeah, if you're really hungry. Ha, ha.
那是笑话 我讲了笑话 It was a joke. I made a joke.
其实 罗斯对龙虾过敏 Yeah, actually, Daddy, Ross is allergic to lobster.
什么人会对龙虾过敏 What kind of person's allergic to lobster?
大概是在图书馆工作的人吧 I guess the kind of person that works in a library. Ha, ha.
- 不是… - 我知道 是博物馆 - It's not... - I know. It's a museum.
你是唯一可以开玩笑的人吗 至少我的比较好笑 What, you're the only who can make a joke? At least mine was funny.
服务生 Uh, waiter.
我们要两只龙虾和一份菜单 We will have two lobsters and a menu.
葛林医生 那艘旧船怎么样了 So, Dr. Green, how's the old boat?
他们发现有铁锈 They found rust.
- 你知道锈会让船怎样吗 - 有怀旧风 - Do you know what rust does to a boat? - Gives it a nice antique-y look?
铁锈等同于船癌 罗斯 Rust is boat cancer, Ross.
哇 真遗憾 Wow, I'm sorry.
我小时候 因为这样失去一台脚踏车 When I was a kid, I lost a bike to that. Ha, ha.
失陪一下 Excuse me for a moment, will you, please?
我们走之前 我想跟李文他们说再见 I wanna say good night to the Levines before we go.
好 Okay.
亲爱的 别这样 没那么糟糕 Honey, stop. It's not that bad.
是啊 Yeah. Oh.
我想你爸写错了 Uh-oh. I think your dad must have added wrong.
他只给了百分之四的小费 He only tipped, like, 4 percent.
对 他就是这样 Yeah. Ahem, that's Daddy.
"他就是这样" 这不会困扰你吗 你也是服务生 "That's Daddy"? Doesn't it bother you? You're a waitress.
的确会 罗斯 Yes, it bothers me, Ross.
但如果他是咖啡厅的常客… But, you know, if he was a regular at the coffee house...
我会在饮料里加喷嚏 ...I'd be serving him sneezers.
- 那又怎样 - 罗斯… - So? - So, Ross...
我跟他抱怨几百次了 他不会变的 ...I've bugged him about this a million times. He's not gonna change.
你真的在饮料里加喷嚏 Do you really serve people sneezers?
嗯 我是不会 Ahem, well, um, I don't.
- 好了 准备走了吗 - 好了 - All right, kids. Ready? - Yes.
再次谢谢你 葛林医生 Thanks again, Dr. Green.
等等 我忘了拿帐单 Wait, wait, wait, I think I forgot my receipt.
- 噢 你不需要的 - 为什么 - Oh, you don't need that. - Ahem, why not?
上面的碳会弄脏你的手指 导致… The carbon. It's messy. I mean, gets on your fingers and causes...
夜盲症 ...the, uh, night blindness.
这是什么 What is this?
谁放的二十元 Who put a 20 down here?
噢 是我 Oh, yeah, that would be me.
我…我有个问题 Um, I have... I have a problem.
我小费给太多了 太多了 I tip way too much, way, way too much.
- 到了病态的地步 - 没错 - It's a sickness, really. - Yeah, it is. It is.
- 我们得想点办法 - 抱歉 - We have to do something about that. - Excuse me.
你觉得我很小气 You think I'm cheap?
爸 他没有这个意思 He didn't mean anything by that.
- 真的没有 - 我做的事都没有什么意思 - He really didn't. - Nothing I do means anything. Really.
太棒了 晚餐我付了两百块 This is nice. I pay $200 for dinner.
你放下二十块 就一副大爷的样子 You put down 20 and you come out looking like Mr. Big-Shot.
你真的想当大爷吗 You really wanna be Mr. Big-Shot?
这样吧 帐单由你来付 大爷 Here. I'll tell you what. You pay the whole bill, Mr. Big-Shot. All right?
至少"大爷" 比"油头"好多了 Well, "Mr. Big-Shot" is better than "Wet-Head."
来点演戏的小诀窍 Okay, some tricks of the trade.
我演戏时都哭不出来 Now, I've never been able to cry as an actor...
如果我得演哭戏… ...so if I'm in a scene where I have to cry...
我会在口袋剪个洞 ...I cut a hole in my pocket...
放个钳子在里面 ...take a pair of tweezers...
然后开始拔毛 ...and just start pulling.
好… 假如我要诠释… Okay. Or uh... Or let's say I want to convey...
刚刚做了邪恶的事情 ...that I've, uh, just done something evil.
就得做出"我的眉毛有个鱼钩"的表情 Well, that would be your basic I've-got-a fish-hook-in-my-eyebrow-and-I-like-it.
好吗 假如我刚刚听到坏消息 No? Okay. Let's say I've just gotten bad news.
我就会试着算232除以13 Well, all I do there is try and divide 232 by 13.
就是这样 And that's how it's done.
今晚的肥皂剧演出到此结束 Great soap opera acting tonight, everybody.
下课 Class dismissed.
- 嘿 老师 - 嘿 - Hey, Mr. Trib. - Hey.
你猜怎么着 我得到试演机会 Guess what. I got an audition.
我的学生有试演机会 我好骄傲 Oh. One of my students got an audition. I'm so proud.
我想问你可不可以教教我 I was wondering if you would consider coaching me for it.
- 当然可以 什么角色 - 很棒的角色 - Oh, you bet. What's the part? - Oh, it's great.
"我的孩子们" 饰演拳击手尼克 It's a role on All My Children. Nick the boxer.
你一定要放钱就对了 不放不行 Had to do it, didn't you? You couldn't leave it alone.
百分之四就算食物里面有虫 我给的小费都比这个多 Four percent, okay? I tip more than that when there's a bug in my food.
罗斯 今晚只是要让你们两个处得来 Ross, tonight was about the two of you getting along.
你可以去看看我的脊椎按摩师吗 Would you see my chiropractor already?
是啊 我会去看一个在小购物商场念医学院的医生 Yeah, I'm gonna go to a doctor who went to medical school in a mini-mall.
菲比 你在干嘛 Hey, Pheebs. What are you doing?
我整个人都吓死了 I'm... I'm freaking out.
摩妮卡交待我做某件事 她真的不该这么做的 Monica kind of trusted me with something and she shouldn't have.
我已经不住在这里很久了 所以得问问你们 All right, I haven't lived here in a while, so I have to ask you.
摩妮卡还会打开她卧室的灯吗 Does Monica still turn the lights on in her bedroom?
- 会 - 我完蛋了 - Ahem. Yeah. - I am so dead.
好 听好我的重点 罗斯 All right, look, here's the bottom line, Ross.
动作快的话 还可以补救 好吗 This is fixable if we act fast, okay?
明天我请他吃早午餐 你可以表现得和善一点 So I'll invite him to brunch tomorrow and you can make nice.
亲爱的 我试过了 但是没用 Honey, I have tried to make nice. It doesn't work.
好 我知道我爸很难搞… Okay. Look, I realize my father is difficult...
所以你心胸要放大一点 ...but that's why you have got to be the bigger man here.
亲爱的 我可以心胸大一点 Look, sweetie, I could be the bigger man. I could be the biggest man.
我心胸可以超大的 但情况还是不会有所改变 I could be a big, huge, giant man and it still wouldn't make a difference.
除了把他抓起来说 "你得喜欢我 小医生"之外 Except that I could pick your father up and say, "Like me. Like me, tiny doctor."
好 你可不可以再试一次 就当作是为了我 Okay, well, can't you just try it one more time, Ross? For me? For me?
瑞秋 一场早午餐是不能解决问题的 Rachel, one brunch is not gonna solve anything.
面对事实吧 我们就是合不来 You've gotta face it. We're never gonna get along.
好 你就是得试试看 Okay, well, you are just going to have to.
懂吗 我已经有两个不能待在同一间房间的双亲 Okay? I've already got a mother and father who cannot stay in the same room.
我不希望还得替你准备另一个房间 I don't want to have a separate room for you too.
好… Okay, okay. Okay.
我去买贝果 I'll get the bagels.
这是什么东东 What's this?
很酷吧 Isn't it cool? Vroom. Vroom.
这不是我订的床垫 This is not the bed I ordered.
我知道 你一定是赢了某种大奖 I know. You must have won, like, a contest or something.
菲比 Phoebe.
为什么这台车会在我房间 Why is this car in my bedroom?
对不起 我那时没注意… I'm sorry, okay. I wasn't looking...
店家说他们不能收回 因为你已经签收了 ...and the store said that they won't take it back because you signed for it.
- 我什么时候签收的 - 我假装是你的时候 - When did I sign for it? - When I was you.
这都是乔伊的错 因为他的鼻子流血 You know what? It's all Joey's fault because he left his nose open.
你今天烤了布朗尼吗 Did you make brownies today?
有人来了 Knock, knock.
快点 脱掉你的衣服 他就不会注意到床 Quick. Take off your dress. He won't notice the bed.
嘿 我要去吃寿司 有人要… Hey, I'm going for sushi. Does anybody want, uh...?
噢 有人忘了下交流道 Whoa. Somebody missed the off-ramp.
这是摩妮卡的床 干嘛 It's Monica's bed. What?
那好… Okay...
这是台赛车 It's a race car.
这一直是摩妮卡的床 你现在才注意到吗 So? This has always been Monica's bed. What, you're just noticing now?
你真是自我中心 How self-involved are you?
如果这张床不是新的… Okay, well, if this bed isn't new...
为什么上面会有胶膜 ...then how come there's plastic on the mattress?
我有时候会做恶梦 Sometimes I have bad dreams.
听好… Look...
我刚刚才看到我的死党脑浆溅在帆布上 ...I just saw my best friend's brain smeared across the canvas.
我不要跟他一样 It's not gonna be me.
绝对不会 Not me.
表演很棒 非常… That was good. That was...
- 有用钳子吗 - 没有 - Tweezers? - No.
- 真的很棒 - 谢了 - That was really good. - Thanks.
有什么建议吗 Any suggestions?
我… Hmm, I...
你叫他演同志拳击手 You told him to play the boxer gay?
嗯 我可能是说"越明显越好" Well, I might have said "super-gay."
你真的是恶搞他 You totally screwed him over.
乔伊 你是他的老师 怎么可以这样 Joey, you're this guy's teacher. I mean, how could you do this?
因为他真的很厉害 Because, Monica, the guy's so good.
我真的真的很想要这个角色 And I really, really want this part.
如果你真的真的想要这个角色 就没有关系 Well, if you really, really want it, then it's okay.
- 嗨 老爸 - 宝贝 - Hi, Daddy. - Baby.
- 罗斯 - 葛林医师 你好 - Ross? - Dr. Green, how are you?
昨晚的晚餐谢谢你 Thanks for dinner last night.
谢谢你教了我宝贵的一课 Thank you for teaching me a valuable lesson.
头发还不赖 你游泳过来的吗 Nice hair. What did you do, swim here?
好 够了 我不能承受了 Okay, that's it. I can't take it anymore.
别这样 他对你很感兴趣 What, what? He's interested in you.
- 喜欢你的头发 只想知道你怎么来的 - 少来了 - He just wants to know how you got here. - Oh, please.
- 没用的 我要走了 - 什么 罗斯 - Sweetie, it's hopeless. I'm just gonna go. - What? Ross.
- 对不起 只是… - 罗斯 - I'm sorry. It's just... - Ross?
你脖子怎么了 What's with the neck?
他不舒服 我一直叫他去看我的脊椎按摩师 He's got this thing and I keep telling him to go to my chiropractor.
你还在看那个脊椎按摩师 You still going to that chiropractor?
那家伙连三流的医学院都进不去 That man couldn't get into med school in lxtapa.
谢谢你 我也是这样说的 Yeah, thank you. That's what I keep saying.
不好意思 巴比医生是个很棒的医生 Excuse me, ahem, Dr. Bobby happens to be an excellent doctor.
等等 他叫做巴比医生 Wait a minute. His name is Dr. Bobby?
- 是他的姓氏 - 名字也是 - Well, that's his last name. - And his first name.
他叫做巴比•巴比 He's Bobby Bobby?
是罗伯•巴比 Ahem. It's Robert Bobby.
而且不好意思 他帮了我很多 And, um, excuse me. He helps me.
- 请你问问她怎么帮的 - 帮你做什么 - Oh. Please. Ask her how? - What do you need help for?
帮我调整骨架 我一只脚比较长 With my alignment. One leg's shorter than the other.
- 天啊 - 是啊 要怎么跟她争 - Oh, my God. - Yeah. Argue with that.
干嘛 是真的 我的右脚短了两寸 What? It's true. My right leg is two inches shorter.
少来了 你只是斜着站 Come on, you're just tilting.
- 她的脚没事 - 我知道啊 - Her legs are fine. - I know that.
- 你为什么让她去看脊椎按摩师 - 什么叫"让她" - So why do you let her go to a chiropractor? - I'm sorry, "Let her"?
她根本不听我的话 连房客保险都不买 What can I do? She doesn't listen to me about renter's insurance, either.
等等 你没有房客保险 Wait a minute. You don't have renter's insurance?
- 没有 - 如果有人偷东西怎么办 - No. Ahem. - So, what if somebody steals something?
你一只脚比较短 要怎么追小偷 How you gonna run after him with one leg shorter than the other?
嘿 你想喝点果汁吗 Hey, would you, uh...? Would you like some juice?
- 好啊 - 好 - I'd love some juice. - Okay.
真的很顺利 你有看到吗 Well, this is going so well. Did you see us? Did you see?
有 我刚刚就站在那里 Yeah, honey. I was standing right there.
你为什么不跟他说我没给医生检查的痣 Why don't you tell him about the mole I haven't gotten checked?
太好了 Excellent.
你在事业生涯中一定会碰到… There will come a time in each of your careers...
搞砸其他肥皂剧演员的机会 ...when you'll have a chance to screw over another soap opera actor.
我最近有这样的机会 I had such an opportunity in the recent present.
我很惭愧地说… And I'm ashamed to say...
我也做了 ...that I took it.
我建议另一位演员以不同的方法表演… I advised a fellow actor to play a role...
演得像同志一样 ...homosexually.
对 Yeah.
我们两人都参与同一个角色的试演 We both auditioned for the part and, uh...
结果… ...as it turned out...
他们… ...they...
他们喜欢愚蠢的同志演出而选了他 They liked the stupid gay thing and cast him.
现在… And now...
他签了两年合约… ...he's got a two-year contract...
跟苏珊•路奇合作… ...opposite Susan Lucci...
日间电视的大红人 ...the first lady of daytime television.
而我呢 And me?
困在这里教一群… Me, I'm stuck here teaching a bunch of people...
丑到连上电视都不行的人 ... most of whom are too ugly to even be on TV.
对不起… I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
谢谢 Thank you.
- 有什么可以效劳的吗 - 有 - Uh, may I help you? - Yes, hi.
我跟你通过电话 我拿到那张赛车床 I'm the lady who got stuck with the race-car bed.
我已经说过了 我帮不上你的忙 Look, it's like I told you. There's nothing I can do.
你已经签收了 "摩妮卡•法鲁拉•盖勒" You signed for it. "Monica Felula Geller."
听好了 弄臣 我们想见国王 All right, jester man, look, we wanna see the king.
没有人能见国王 Nobody sees the king.
好 我要去找他讲话 Okay. I'm talking to the king.
嘿 你不能进去 Hey, you can't go back there.
（床垫大王）
我的天啊 Oh, my God.
喂 女士 小心点 Hey, watch it, lady.
嘿 美女 Hey, good-looking.
好 我要走了 All right, I'll leave.
我的床好无聊喔 My bed's so boring.