《绝望的主妇》前情提要 Previously on...Desperate Housewives
卡洛斯的侄女来了 Carlos' niece arrived
我们想让你成为家庭一员 We want you to be part of this family,
但你必须守我们的规矩 But you will obey our rules.
勒奈特和汤姆收到重大消息 Lynette and Tom got big news.
-我们就要再有个孩子了 -双胞胎 - We're gonna have another baby. - Twins
你真想把你妻子送去坐牢 You would actually send your wife to prison?
我妻子 不会 我前妻 当然了 My wife--No. My ex-wife--you bet.
奥森使出了勒索这招 Orson resorted to blackmail.
你是我遇到过的 I think you're the most fascinating woman
最迷人的女人 That I have ever met.
卡尔也展开了行动 And karl made his move.
凯瑟琳和迈克的婚姻 Katherine's marriage to mike...
告诉跟我一起的那位女士 我先走了 That woman I was with -- tell her I had to go.
-情况紧急 -...却被搁置了 - It's an emergency. - ...was put on hold.
你们很危险 设法离开那辆车 You guys are in danger. Get out of that car.
离大卫远远的 Get away from Dave.
待到尘埃落定 婚礼的钟声终于敲响 And when the dust settled, wedding bells rang
为某人敲响 For someone.
面纱用最好的丝绸做成 The veil was made from the finest silk.
吊带用手织的蕾丝编成 The garter was trimmed with handmade lace.
鞋子由米兰最好的设计师设计 The shoes were designed by the top couturier in Milan.
新娘都想自己的婚礼尽善尽美 The bride wanted only the best for her wedding day
因为她即将与 Because she was about to marry
世上最好的男人 The best man in the world...
复婚 For the second time.
-感觉如何 -觉得自己是世界上最坏的人 - How do you feel? - Like the worse person in the world.
别这么对你自己 Don't do this to yourself.
凯瑟琳永远都不会原谅我的 Katherine is never gonna forgive me for this.
妈妈 今天是你的大日子 Mom, this is your day.
你和迈克是天生一对 You and Mike were meant to be together.
祝我好运 Wish me luck.
藉由我所被赋予的权力 Then by the power vested in me,
我现在宣布你们 I now pronounce you
成为夫妻 Husband and wife.
新郎可以亲吻新娘了 You may kiss the bride.
是的 新娘想要最豪华最好的婚礼 Yes, the bride wanted the best wedding money could buy
但当她步下神坛 她马上就意识到... But as she left the altar, it suddenly occurred to her...
抱歉我迟到了 我错过什么了吗 Sorry I'm late. Did I miss anything?
她真该在保安工作上再多花点钱的 She should've spent more on security.
[婚礼前八周]
在郊区 要发现罪孽之事并不困难 It's not hard to find sin in the suburbs.
只要往紧闭的门内看进去 Just look behind closed doors.
你就会发现你的邻居们 That's where you'll find your neighbors
偷税漏税 Cheating on their taxes...
滥饮伏特加酒 And drinking too much Vodka...
偷他们父亲的杂志看 And stealing their father's magazines.
是的 郊区充斥着罪人 Yes, the suburbs are filled with sinners,
其中有些 偶尔也会幡然醒悟 Some of who occasionally... repent.
我们不能这么做 We can't do this.
这是通奸 It's adultery.
幸好 我们都是成年人 Luckily, we're both adults.
住手 我结婚了 Mmm. stop! I'm married.
是啊 跟个勒索你的男人 Yes, to a man who's blackmailing you.
你不觉得跟你们的离婚律师做爱 Don't you think making love to your divorce lawyer
将是对他最好的报复 Would be a nifty way to get back at him?
卡尔 不行 不 Oh, Karl. No. No!
又怎么了 What now?
即使我想破戒 If I'm gonna break a commandment,
也不想在这沙发上草草了事 I don't want it to be for a quickie on this couch.
谁说的 十点前我还有40分钟空档 Who said quickie? I've got 40 minutes before my 10:00.
保证让你欲仙欲死 And thou shalt get sweaty.
我也想跟你做 真的 但不是在这 I wanna do this. I do. But not here.
得让我觉得自己是特别的 I need to feel special.
但你本就是特别的 But you are special.
你敢说 Are you saying
你从来没跟别的女人在这沙发上做过 You've never made love to another woman on this couch?
但她们都并不特别 Not a special woman.
好吧 Okay. All right.
我懂 我懂 I get it. I get it.
我也想好好爱你 我会去找家宾馆 I want this to be nice for you. I'll find us a hotel.
都安排好了再给我打电话 Call me later when you've set something up.
说好了 Done.
先说清楚 本次会面不能作数(指律师不收费) And just so we're clear, this visit was not billable.
早 我要迟到了 没时间吃早饭了 Morning. I'm late for school. I don't have time for breakfast.
至少带块松饼吃 At least take a muffin.
谢谢 卡洛斯叔叔 Thank you, uncle Carlos.
这天穿长袖有点热 不是吗 Kind of warm for a sweatshirt, isn't it?
教室里实在有点冷 Oh, it gets really cold in the classroom.
站住 Mm. stop.
-把衣服掀起来 -加布 - Lift it up. - Gaby.
花一小时化妆的女孩子 Girls who spend an hour on makeup
不会穿这样宽松衣服的 衣服掀起来 Do not wear baggy sweatshirts. Lift it.
教室里有这么热吗 Well, that oughta heat up the classroom.
-去换一件 -加布 你发什么神经 - Go and change. - Gaby, what is your problem?
我们班所有女孩子都这么穿 All the girls in my class dress like this.
所以你们学校的护士是个产科医生 That's why your school nurse is an obstetrician.
-去换件别的 -好 我就借件你的上衣穿 - Wear something else. - Fine. I'll borrow one of your tops.
你的上衣一定乐坏了 It might be exciting for it to go someplace
除了超市它还能见到别的地方 Besides the supermarket.
又吵了 Oh, snap!
当心我揍你 Hey, you I can hit.
看到了吧 我要忍受多少东西 Do you see what I have to put up with?
-只是一件衬衫而已 -是吗 - It was just a shirt. - Yeah?
每次她都是宵禁后才回家 And when she came home past curfew,
只是晚了40分钟 It was just 40 minutes.
每次她从我皮包里拿钱 And when she took money from my purse,
也只是5美元 It was just $5.
你为什么要这么将就她 Why do you always make excuses for her?
她的生活很不幸 She's had a sad life.
她妈蹲牢房 老爸也出走了 Her mom's in jail. Her dad walked out.
是 是 Yeah, yeah,
她就是乡村音乐里唱的那只可怜的小狗 She's one dead dog away from a country song.
我才不管这些 I don't care.
如果让她有安全感的话 Maybe she would calm down
她应该就会学乖一点 If she felt a little more secure here.
我不会签字的 I'm not signing those papers.
我们做她的合法监护人 We need to be her legal guardians.
要我照顾她两年 不可能 And look after her for the next two years? No.
除非她改改那些行为举止 Until I see a change in her behavior,
否则一切免谈 I'm keeping all my options open.
这样可以了吧 Is this better?
可以了 很好 谢谢 Yes. Very nice. Thank you.
站住 Stop.
我闻到什么味儿了 Mmm. What do I smell?
绝望 逝去 和对崩溃的恐惧 Despair. Mortality. Paralyzing fear.
我想是华夫饼干的味道 Oh. I thought it was waffles.
你有没有想过 Do you realize that
当这对双胞胎读完高中时 When these twins finish high school,
我已经60岁高龄了 I'll be in my 60s?
不 No.
不是 你应该只有 No, you'll be in your, uh...
在他们的毕业典礼上 At their graduation,
我就是那个下巴上沾着燕麦片的疯老婆子 I will be the crazy old lady with oatmeal on her chin.
听着 我明白这不在计划之中 Look, I know this wasn't planned,
但我们能挺过去的 But we--we can do this.
就像当初我们抚养着四个孩子也是其乐无穷啊 I mean, we had a lot of fun raising the first four kids.
汤姆 我们完蛋了 But we were done, tom.
我们已经过了那个年龄了 We were across the finish line.
不再面对尿布 No more diapers.
不再紧张兮兮地喂他们吃胡萝卜 No more strained carrots.
-不再念那些愚蠢的"月亮晚安"的故事 -勒奈特 - No more reading stupid "goodnight, moon"! - Lynette--
普雷斯顿去欧洲玩 And with Preston going to Europe,
好不容易少了一个 We even had one moving out!
但如果每次少一个 We will never be done
又添两个 我们永远都没有结束的那天 If we birth two every time one moves out!
那么简单你算不出吗 That's just math!
还要忍受8个半月 Eight and half months to go.
太棒了 Yay.
你没事吧 Are you all right?
很搞笑你知道吗 You know what's funny?
我脑袋里从未有过我们白头到老的画面 I was never able to picture us old together,
悠闲地坐在走廊上 灰白的头发 Sitting on the porch, gray hair.
我试着去想象 I tried,
但我就是看不到 But I could never see it.
很抱歉 I'm sorry.
凯瑟琳 你不必 Oh, Katherine, you don't have to--
麦克 拜托了 Mike, please.
我不想睹物思人 I don't need another reminder of you.
怎么样了 她还好吧 So... how'd it go? How was she?
她 还好 She was... okay.
还好 这是什么意思 "Okay"? What does that mean?
你全都说了吗 I mean, did you tell her everything?
你说过我们要结婚了吗 Did you tell her we're getting married?
说了 我猜她是想积极地面对吧 Yeah. I think she's trying to take the high road.
积极面对？ The high road?
是“祝福苏珊和你幸福美满”这种积极面对 Um, as in, "I wish you and susan the best"?
还是“切断苏珊的刹车， Or the high road as in, "when I cut susan's brake line,
让她在高速路上完蛋" She'll careen off the high road"?
她知道我们的关系已经完了 Well, she knows it's over,
她会调节的 And she's dealing with it.
让你为难了 Mm, that must have been really hard for you.
嗯 已经过去了 Yeah, it was.
既然她都知道了 你也好过去跟她谈谈了 But now that she knows, it'll be easier when you talk to her.
我去跟她谈谈 Me talk to her?
为什么 为什么 为什么 Uh, why? why? why?
你才是她约会的对象 I--you're the one who was dating her,
我 我只是 我不去 I'm--I just... I don't...
那就这样吧 I think we're good now.
亲爱的 有些事还是得你去跟她说说的 Honey, you're gonna have to deal with her at some point.
好吧 我会的 我会的 Fine. Yes, I will. I will.
不是今天 朱莉今天回家 Um, just, uh, not today, 'cause today Julie's coming home
我要安顿她 And, uh... you know, I wanna get her settled in.
明天去怎么样 So... What about tomorrow?
也不太好 Ooh, that's not good either,
我和朱莉要去取我的婚纱 'Cause julie and I are gonna pick out my wedding dress.
她就住在你街对面 You live right across the street from her.
你不能以后50年都避着她的 You can't avoid her for the next 50 years.
不用50年 Well, not 50.
只要等到她老得没力气拿东西扔我就行 Just till she's too old to throw things.
你多虑了 Don't worry about it.
我相信凯瑟琳会给你惊喜的 I think Katherine's really gonna surprise you.
所有的窗户都是节能的三层玻璃 All of the windows are triple pane energy efficient.
我应该说过 这些硬木地板都已经 Oh, and I should mention the hardwood floors were
全部重新翻新了 黑胡桃木的 Completely redone recently. Black walnut.
很好 It'sice.
你们还有什么疑问吗 So do you have any questions for me?
没了 你已经面面俱到了 Nah, I think you pretty much got it covered.
真的吗 签单吧(此句双关为"泡我吧") Really? Check me out!
我才干这行 上周才拿到工作执照 I'm--I'm new at this. I just got my broker's license last week.
祝贺你 Congratulations.
你第一单生意出售的这房子确实不错 It's a pretty nice house for your first listing.
是我时运当头 隔壁家负责这个工作的女人 I got really lucky. The woman who handled
开车撞到了电线杆上 The properties in the neighborhood--
结果电线杆漏电 She slammed her car into a pole
把她电死了 And got fried by a power line.
所以说 恭喜你了 Like I said, congrats.
伯伦太太怎么沉默不语 Uh, Mrs. Bolen's been awfully quiet.
您意下如何 So what do you think?
我吗 我觉得你废话连篇 Me? I'm thinkin' you're full of crap.
什么 I'm sorry?
那么好的房子居然出价那么低 Well, the fact that we can afford this place
当中必定有猫腻 Says to something is wrong with it.
坦白说吧 So, uh, start talkin'.
发霉 白蚁 还是房顶漏水 Mold? Termites? Leaky roof?
老实说 我已经知无不言了 Honestly, I have told you everything that I know.
行 你就这么耍把戏吧 Sure, you could play it like that.
但如果我们真的成交了 But if we do buy this place
却发现它是赔钱货 And it turns into a money pit,
那我就需要找个人出气 I'm gonna need to take my anger out on someone.
比如 那个做了笔大买卖 Like maybe the realtor who made a big deal
就住在对面的房地产经纪人 Out of telling us he lives right across the street?
好吧 不知道这是否 Okay, well, I don't know
是一个瑕疵 That this is actually considered a flaw,
但是以前 房子的女主人 But a while ago, uh, the lady who was living here--
生活不太如意 She was apparently going through kind of a tough time,
简单说 她自杀了 And long story short, she committed suicide.
用枪 Shot herself...
一枪爆头 In--in the head.
就这房间 In this room.
就这样 That's it?
是 没错 Well, yeah.
我们买了 We'll take it.
真的 这真是 太 Really? Oh, that is so... that is--
好的 那我去拿文件 Okay, I'll just--I'll just get the paperwork.
这地方不错 It's a nice place.
我们会过的开心的 I think we could be happy here.
对吧 丹尼 Right, Danny?
问我干嘛 Why are you asking me?
我不稀罕这鸟地方 I didn't want to move here.
宝贝儿 Oh, honey.
谁害得我们搬家呢 Whose fault was that?
朱莉 看看你 Julie! Look at you!
[婚礼前6个星期]
安吉 这些太好吃了 Oh, Angie, these are incredible.
叫啥来着 What do you call 'em again?
匹萨丝 都吃了吧 我做了6打 Pizzelles. Come on, eat up. I made six dozen.
祖母给我的食谱是30人的分量 My grandmother's recipes were always for 30 people.
相信我 她一周就能把你们四个养胖 Trust me, she'd fatten you four up in a week.
脂肪直接堆积到屁股 These go straight to your ass.
抱歉 你们不说"屁股"吗 Okay. I'm sorry. Do you guys not say "ass"?
当然说 Sure, we do.
布里 说给她听听 Come on, Bree. Show her.
苏珊告诉我 So, uh, Susan tells me
你儿子要上大学了 That your son is about to start college.
是的 刚开始办理入学手续 Mm-hmm. We're just dealing with some paperwork,
他下个礼拜就应该上课了 But he should be startin' sometime next week.
我以为他已经开课了 Oh, I thought he was already in class.
他叫朱莉辅导他数学 Uh, he asked Julie to tutor him in math.
是吗 Really?
肯定是凯萨琳 Oh, that must be Katherine.
我去开门 I'll get it.
凯萨琳 你没说她也会来 Katherine? Y-you didn't say Katherine was coming.
她只是过来给我东西 She's just dropping something off.
怎么了 麦克那事之后你见过她了啊 What's the matter? You've seen her since this Mike thing.
是 是的 算是吧 Oh, yeah... sorta. Your voice just got very high.
你声调都变了 Your voice just got very high.
难道你还没和她谈过 You have talked to her, haven't you?
我 我准备去的 I'm... going to.
我只是忙着筹办婚礼 I've just been so busy with all the wedding plans.
这开场白可不好哦 Yeah, I wouldn't open with that.
我只是过来给你 I'm just dropping off the menu
达文波特夫妇的周年宴会菜单 For the Davenport anniversary party.
你已经做完了吗 还有三个月呐 You finished that? Already? It's three months away.
这些日子我闲得发慌 Well, I have a lot of free time on my hands these days.
好啊 苏珊 Hello, Susan.
你好 凯萨琳 Hi, Katherine.
最近好吗 How--how are you doing?
好久没见你了 Haven't seen you in a while.
我最近 well, I've been...
经常用后门进出 Using the back door a lot more lately.
凯萨琳 你的扣子 Katherine, your buttons...
我脑子有点发昏 I don't know where my head is anymore.
是我的错觉吗 Whoa. Was it just me
刚才让人尴尬的喘不过气 Or was that the most awkward moment ever?
用屁股想都知道是 You bet your sweet ass it was.
亲爱的 给我倒杯水吧 Hon, could you get me a glass of water, please?
-没问题 -谢谢 - You got it. - Thanks.
我们的第一胎 It's our first.
看出来了 Yeah, I got that.
你呢 How about you?
生了四个 怀了两个 Four at home, two on the way.
大家庭啊 真幸福 Oh, big family. You're so blessed.
做妈妈是这世界上最甜蜜的事了 I just can't imagine anything better than being a mommy.
是吗 Really?
当然 我知道很辛苦 I mean, I know it's a lot of work,
幸运的是 我先生会全力协助 But luckily my husband plans to be really hands-on.
那是 不可能滴 Yeah. That's not gonna happen.
什么 Pardon?
一开始他会帮你 Oh, he'll be there at first,
也许换一两片尿布什么的 Maybe even change a diaper or two
新鲜劲很快就过了 Until the novelty wears off.
至于凌晨四点帮忙喂奶 But those 4:00 a.m. feeding
你还是别指望了 He said he'd help out with? Forget it.
你不认识我老公强尼 他不一样 Oh, you don't know my Johnny. He's different.
他有乳房吗 Does he have boobs?
没 No.
那只能你自己来 Then you're the only bar in town.
你孩子朝婴儿监控器大哭 That baby can scream into a bullhorn,
而强尼动都懒得动 And Johnny won't budge.
是 是吗 O-okay.
谢谢 Thanks.
我还没说完 I'm not done.
看到了吗 You see this?
你再也穿不了比基尼了 You'll never wear a bikini again.
可你生了四个孩子 But you've had four kids,
你现在身材也不错啊 And you look good.
你还没见过我不穿衣服 You haven't seen me naked.
我的小腹就像坨西班牙灰泥 My stomach looks like spanish stucco.
而我的乳房就像 And my breasts resemble two balloons
放了一周的漏气气球 You'd find behind the couch a week after the party.
大多数女人都说这是她们毕生最棒的经历 Most women say this is the greatest experience of theirife.
大多数女人都是骗子 Most women are liars.
我母亲骗了我 My mother was liar,
因为她母亲骗了她 而你母亲也骗了你 And her mother was a liar,and your mother is a liar.
这是代代相传的谎话 It's a lie every generation tells the next
这样她们就能儿孙满堂 So they can get grandchildren.
请别再说了 Please stop talking to me.
不 你得听着 这样才能做好万全准备 No, you need to hear this. you have to be prepared.
你的孩子会打你 还会偷你的钱 Your children will hit you and steal from your purse.
你丈夫 Your husband will begin
随便买份生日礼物打发你 to buy your birthday presents at the car wash
更要命的是 你的余生 And the kicker-- for the rest of yo life,
常常感到孤单寂寞 There will be so many moments when you feel lonely,
但别妄想得到一刻安宁 But you will never be alone.
没水了 果汁可以吗 They were out of water.Is juice okay?
荷尔蒙 Hormones.
习惯就好了 Get used to it.
总算让我盼来这一天了 I cannot believe we are finally going to do this.
你真不是个容易摆平的女人 You're not an easy woman to pin down,
但我乐于碰壁 But I sure am going tonjoy trying.
怎么 What?
这太出乎意料了 This is not what I was expecting.
我的身材还是挺健美的 Hey, I think I look pretty good for my age.
不是说你 卡尔 我是说这屋子 Not you, karl. the room.
这里又脏又臭 It's filthy and hideous.
上周带你去豪华宾馆 Well, I took you to a nice hotel last week,
但被熟人撞见 只好走了 And we had to leave 'cause you saw someone you knew.
在这还能撞见什么人 Who we gonna run into here?
总之不会遇见整洁的女士 Well, certainly not a cleaning lady.
好吧 这里是有点脏 Okay, so it's a little dusty.
可相信我 一旦开始缠绵 你绝对会忘乎所以 But trust me,once I get started, you'll never even notice.
天呐 看这些床单 My god, those sheets!
怎么了 What's wrong with them?
褪色 破烂 They're discolored, threadbare
还散发着工业漂白剂的臭味 And reek of industrial bleach.
给我五分钟时间 他们就会散发我们的味道 You give me five minutes, they'll reek of us.
卡尔 我不想躺在那破床单上 Karl, I'm not gonna lie on that revolting sheet,
想着多少瘾君子死在那上面 Wondering how many junkies have died on it.
你想让我怎么处理 What do you want me to do about it?
埃及棉 Ooh, Egyptian cotton!
很漂亮 是吧 These are pretty, aren't they?
很好 我喜欢 走吧 Great. love 'em. let's go.
我挑什么你都这么说 It doesn't help when you say that about every single set.
布里 一小时前我还半裸着身子 Bree, an hour ago, I was half naked.
现在却在挑床单 Now, I am sheet shopping.
我也不容易啊 Forgive me if I'm an easy sell.
我担心这颜色不配地毯 I'm just not sure this colour will match the carpet.
我会选蓝色的 I’ll get them in blue.
我会告诉你它们配什么 I'll tell you what they'll match then.
好吧 我就买这个 Fine, I'll take these.
现在 我们只要路上买些花 Now, we just neet to stop for some flowers.
买花 Flowers?
我只希望能尽善尽美 I just want this affair to be nice.
你不是追求尽善尽美 You know, you don't want this affair to be nice.
你压根就不想和发生关系 You don't want it at all.
别傻了 Don't be silly.
我当然想 Of course I do.
你自欺欺人 You may think you do.
可我已经追了你两周 But I have been chasing you two weeks.
可你总是推三阻四 诸多借口 And you've down nothing but throw up roadblocks.
今晚不行 "not tonight."
这间宾馆不好 "not this hotel."
那些床单太烂 "not those sheets."
卡尔 Karl
如果你觉得我在耍你 那就错了 if you think I've been leading you on, you're wrong.
布里 不是你的错 Bree, it's not your fault.
只是你的本性使然 It's just who you are.
你是个乖女孩 无论多苛刻的规矩 You're a good girl, never breaks the rules
你都会循规蹈矩 no matter how miserable it makes her.
我以为"卡尔时光"能给你生活加点料 I thought a little karl time might brighten your day.
我现在投降了 But there's not much I can do for someone
你继续当你的乖乖女 who'd rather be good.
拒绝快乐的生活吧 Than happy.
要帮忙吗 Can I help you?
有份快递给苏珊·梅尔 I've got a delivery for Susan Mayer.
可她不在家 But she's not home.
能替她签收吗 Do you mind signing for her?
新娘服装
那一定是她的婚纱 Oh. that must be her gown.
我来接收吧 Of course I'll take it.
我们经常这样互相帮助 We do things like this for each other all the time.
事实上 就在上个月 In fact, just last month,
她从我这里接收了些东西 She took in something of mine.
天呐 Oh, god.
天呐 天呐 天呐 Oh, god. oh, god. oh, god.
凯瑟琳 是我 Um, katherine, it's me.
我来是为了拿我的 I-i've just come over to pick up my...
好啊 苏珊 Hello, susan.
好吧 我可没料想到为这一幕 Okay, I did not see that coming.
婚纱太美了 It's just so beautiful.
我无法抗拒 I couldn't resist.
谢谢你替我保管好婚纱 Thank you for taking such good care of it.
可我该走了 But I should probably go now,
所以如果你想脱下来 然后 So if you just wanna slip it off and...
等下 我得去看看我做的沙司 Oh, wait. I have to check on my sauce.
沙司 Sauce?
闻起来很香吧 Doesn't that smell good?
闻起来熟了 It smells done.
要不 你离锅远一点 Why don't you step away from the pot?
不行 秘诀就在于不停的搅拌 Oh, no. the secret is you have to keep stirring.
知道吗 You know,
我真的很喜欢这种布料 I really love this fabric.
感觉很昂贵 It feels so expensive.
确实如此 It is.
所以他们才用那种无酸薄棉纸 That's why they had it all protected with that
和塑胶衣袋来层层保护 acid-free tissue paper and plastic garment bag.
或许 Maybe...
我该让你带点沙司给麦克 I should give you some of this sauce to take to mike.
他之前很爱吃我做的沙司 He used to love my sauce.
当然 Of course,
他之前也很爱我 He used to love me, too.
好了 别摆弄沙司了 Okay, enough with the sauce.
婚纱还给我 马上 I want my dress back now.
当然 抱歉 Of course. I'm sorry.
能帮我拉下拉链吗 Can you please unzip me?
这件婚纱真的很美 It really is a beautiful dress.
-凯瑟琳真的穿着这件婚纱吗 -对 - Katherine was actually wearing the dress? - Yes
别挡我的光 继续擦 Stop blocking my light. keep blotting.
妈 别紧张 我们把污点都清除了 Ugh! mom, relax. we got all the spots.
不 我还能看到红点点 No, I still see flecks of red.
这是你第三次举行婚礼 It's your third wedding.
一件全白婚纱只是点缀而已 An all-white dress is gonna be a stretch anyway.
帮个忙 Do me a favor.
别在祝酒时开"我妈是荡妇"的玩笑 Save the "my mom's a slut" jokes for the toast.
你觉得我该再和她谈谈吗 You think I should go talk to her again?
什么 为什么 what? why?
她明显比想象中更伤心 Well, she's obviouy hurting more than I thought.
你说什么 Excuse me,
她扣押了我的婚纱 she kidnapped my wedding dress
还把头纱放到整锅沙司旁边 And held a pot of sauce to its head!
你怎么还袒护她 How could you possibly defend her?
我没袒护她 I'm not defending her.
只是有点担心 你不担心吗 I'm just a little concerned. aren't you?
不 我是说 No! I mean...
当然 我曾经担心 Yes, I was.
可事到如今 我受够了 But at this point, I'm a little sick of her.
你知道吗 Do you know that
我告诉别人我要结婚时 When I told people that I'm getting married,
没人恭喜我 No one says congratulations.
他们都说 "天呐 凯瑟琳接受得了吗" They all say, "oh, my god. is katherine okay?
凯瑟琳怎么想 How's katherine?"
难道没人记得你最先是和我好的吗 Does no one remember that you were with me first?
是她先捡我的破鞋穿的 大家都忘了吗 She stole my leftovers. does nobody remember that?
她刚说我是破鞋吗 Did she just refer me to be leftovers?
重点是我没做错 My point is that I didn't do anything wrong.
你我生了个孩子 You and I have a child,
我只是厌倦了当局外人 And I am just tired of feeling like the other woman.
恐怖吧 你选的两个女人里 Scary part is, of the two women you could marry,
那个是比较正常 That's the stable one.
谢谢你载我去商店 Thanks for taking me to the store.
我答应了罗伊要给他做烘肉卷 I promised Roy I'd make him meatloaf.
我替你开心 oh, I think it's sweet That
你老来能有人相伴 you found a male companion at this stage in your life.
罗伊不只是陪伴 他可有真本事哦 Roy's no companion. the man has seen paris.
没错 我又开始了性生活 That's right. I'm back in the saddle.
导火索是这样的 一天晚上 It started one night when roy asked
罗伊问我的浴缸够不够两个人洗澡 If my bathtub was big enough for two--
你想让我撞车吗 我可真会这么做 Hey! you want me to crash the car? 'cause I will.
加布婶婶 Hey, aunt gaby.
要给你洗车吗 Need your car washed?
现在叫我加布婶婶了 Oh! I'm aunt gaby now?
我猜猜 你有所求 Let me guess. you want something.
明晚有个派对 Well, there is a party tomorrow night...
真的吗 Really?!
好 你去吧 Okay, you can go.
真的吗 Seriously?
既然你都努力改进了 Well, if you can make an effort around here,
我也可以让步 10点前回家就行 Then I guess I can, too. just be home by 10:00.
对 问题就在这 Yeah, that's the thing.
派对晚上11点才开始 The party doesn't start till 11:00.
哪种派对11点才开始 What kind of party start at 11:00?
城里一家新舞厅要开张 This new dance club is opening downtown,
而且这是最火爆的事 And it is, like, the hottest thing ever.
-人人都会去 -不是人人 - Everybody's going. - Not everybody.
还在上学期间 你也知道规矩 It's a school night, and you know the rules.
但还是谢谢你洗了车 But thank you for washing the car.
翻脸如翻书啊 Well, she's quite the charmer.
知道我的处境了吧 Do you see what I'm dealing with?
我和卡洛斯收留了她 I mean, Carlos and I basically took her off the street.
她不但不感激 还每天和我对着干 You'd think she'd be grateful. but every day is a battle.
我真不知道该怎么和她相处 I don't know how to get through to her.
青春期女孩 这就是不要孩子的最好理由 Teenage girls--they're the best reason for not having kids.
幸好罗伊切除了输精管 Thank god Roy had a vasectomy.
以这个人口数据为基础 So based on the data given for this population,
再用标准差公式 And using the standard deviation formula,
你觉得变量是多少 What do you think this variable is?
你想不想去看场电影 Would you like to go to a movie sometime?
这不算是约会 It's not like it would be a date or anything.
我们是朋友 对吧 We're friends, right?
朋友经常会一起看电影 Friends go to movies all the time.
不知道你明不明白 I don't know if you know that.
你明白吗 Did you know that?
我明白 I did know that.
好吧 Okay.
真的 Really?
太好了 That's great.
朱莉 很高兴又见到你 Hey, Julie. nice to see you again.
丹尼 能帮我倒下垃圾吗 Danny, do me a favor and take the trash out, will ya?
我可以晚点再倒吗 Uh... can I do it a little later?
可以 当然可以 Uh, yeah. yeah, you could,
但最好还是现在就去 But I think you're gonna do it right now.
谢谢你 Hey, thanks for doing that.
谢什么 Doing what?
没有打击他 Not shooting him down.
他可能不是你喜欢的类型 I know he's probably not your type.
不 我喜欢他 他很善良 No, I like him. he's nice.
对是对 可他不属于你的圈子 Yeah,yeah. Clearly not in your league.
亲爱的 要加班你辛苦了 I'm sorry you have to work late, sweetie.
别担心 家里一切都好 Don't worry about us. everything is fine here.
晚安 安娜 Good night, Ana.
抱歉 Oh! sorry.
安娜付了我5块钱 Ana paid me $5.
肌肉男 把我举起来 Ooh! hey, muscles. I need a lift.
手 别乱摸 Ooh! hey! hands! hands! hands!
打扰一下 um, excuse me!
抱歉打扰 能不能听我说 Sorry to interrupt. but can I have your attention, please?
好吧 你们好 我的侄女在这栋楼里 Okay. hi. my niece is somewhere in this building.
她一头棕发 穿金色紧身裤和乳白色上衣 She's got brown hair, gold leggings, a cream top...
都是从我衣橱里拿的 Which she took from my closet.
麻烦你们看看周围 把她找出来 So if you could just look around and point her out...
别闹 这很重要 她只有16岁 No, hey, hey, this is important, okay? She's only 16.
而且她来这里 And she came here
是没得到家中同意的 Even though she knew she wasn't supposed to.
要么帮我找到侄女 Either you find my niece,
要么我会叫来警察 当然还有缉毒犬 Or I will call the cops with their drug-sniffing dogs.
找到了 她在那儿 Found her over here!
在这儿 住手 放我下来 Here she is! stop. Put me down.
你们 Somebody...
放开你的手 让我下来 Get your hands off me. Let me down.
天哪 你在干什么 God, what are you doing?
谢了 各位 Thank you, everybody.
放音乐 put the music back on.
我告诉过你别和我斗 I told you not to mess with me.
安娜 我受不了了 I cannot keep doing this, Ana.
你想怎样 把我踢出去 Or what? You're gonna throw me out?
没问题 Fine.
我求之不得 You'd actually be doing me a favor.
我能照顾自己的 I can take care of myself.
你才16岁 你打算靠什么挣钱 You're 16. How exactly are you gonna make money?
我...我可以做模特 I'm... I'm gonna be a model.
-模特 -是啊 - A model? - Yeah.
很多人说我很漂亮 You know, people tell me that I'm pretty enough.
我可以去巴黎或纽约 I-I will just--I'll go to paris or new york,
会有星探发现我的 And I will get discovered.
我就会变得很有钱 很有名 And I will be rich and famous,
就没有人再对我指手画脚 And no one will ever tell me what to do again.
你真觉得做模特就这么简单 And you really think it's that easy to become a model?
你都能做 It was for you.
你15岁就离家了 What, you left home when you were only 15.
我没得选 因为我的继父... No, I left because I had to. My stepfather was...
不是一个好人 Not a nice man.
我妈妈根本就不管我 My mother didn't care about me.
我才3岁的时候我爸爸就走了 My father left when I was 3,
从那以后我母亲就成了监狱的常客 And my mother's be in and out of prison ever since.
我不会输给你的 I can beat you at this game.
这不是游戏 而是你的人生 This is not a game, Ana! this is your life.
别想吓唬我 行吗 You can't scare me, all right?
我可不想待在不受欢迎的地方 And I don't stay where I'm not wanted.
你好意思这么说 Oh, don't give me that.
我们给你吃的 给你住的 We feed you. we put a roof over your head.
你还准备随时改变主意 And you're also keeping all your options open.
我都听见了 I heard.
你回来了 太好了 Oh, good, you're back.
孩子都很听话 The girls haven't made a peep.
加布 Gaby?
我拿定主意了 No more options.
现在我是你的法定监护人了 I am now officially your guardian.
那又怎样啊 So... what?
想感动我 让我拥抱你吗 I'm supposed to hug you now?
你不会想要拥抱我的 No, you're not gonna want to hug me,
因为从此时此刻 Because from here on out,
我会死死盯着你 凡事都要报告 I am gonna be watching you like a hawk.
包括你要去哪里 I wanna know where you are going,
和谁一块去 Who you are going with,
什么时间回家 And when you are coming home.
我不会让你毁掉你的人生的 And I'm gonna keep you from ruining that life
打消你独自生活的念头吧 You are so anxious to start living.
你真卑鄙 You are so mean.
说得没错 Yeah.
我多希望 And I wish...
多希望 I wish...
那时也有人这样卑鄙得对待我 Someone had been this mean to me when I was your age.
听着 这不是你想象的那么简单 Danny, look, it's complicated.
不 本来就很简单 No, it's really simple, julie.
你只关心你自己 You only care about yourself.
-听我解释 -去死吧 - Please let me explain! - Go to hell.
婚礼前一天
凯瑟琳说你在这儿 Katherine said you were here.
我想 既然你来了 And I thought, since you were already in church,
那我们就去找牧师 We might see the pastor
帮我们安排下婚姻咨询 And schedule some counseling sessions.
奥森 我不需要什么咨询 我要离婚 I don't need counseling, Orson. I need a divorce.
别告诉我不需要咨询 Don't tell me we don't need counseling.
你在客房已经睡了好几个星期了 You've been sleeping in the guest room for weeks.
-我们不应该是这样的 -我同意 - It's not right. - I agree,
如果你稍微有一丁点风度 And if you had An ounce of chivalry,
就换我睡卧室 You'd have given me the master.
或许你认为不和我同房 You might think that with holding sex
我就会妥协 Will make me give up on us.
可我很有耐心 But I can be very patient.
你也知道 入狱期间 You do realize in prison,
我三年都没有性生活 I went three whole years without any sex.
和我无关 不过感谢你的坦白 No, but thank you for clearing up a question
否则我还不好意思问 I never quite knew how to ask.
布里 8年前 Bree, eight years ago,
我们也站在这里 We stood at an altar like this,
在上帝面前宣誓爱对方 And we made a vow before god to love each other.
难道你认为我没有挣扎吗 Do you think I haven't struggled with this?
我忍受了怎样的煎熬 I've struggled with this in ways
你根本体会不到 You can't even begin to imagine.
那让我来帮你 我能让你快乐的 Then let me help you. I can make you happy again.
凭什么 勒索我 How? By blackmailing me?
我不是你的妻子了 奥森 我是你的俘虏 I'm not your wife anymore, Orson. I'm your captive.
你从头到尾都没有愧疚过吗 Don't you feel any remorse at all over that?
当然有 Of course I do,
不过有时 But sometimes guilt
愧疚是幸福的代价 Is a small price to pay for happiness.
宝宝A就在这儿了 There it is. Baby number one.
上帝啊 能看见宝宝 逃课也值了 Oh, my god. It was so worth cutting class to hear this.
第二个在这里 很好 心跳有力 And... there's number two. Good, strong heartbeats.
勒奈特 这太棒了 Isn't that great, Lynette?
是啊 很棒 Yeah. Terrific.
我去... I'll...
叫护士来 帮你清洁一下 Get the nurse, have her come clean you up.
谢谢 Thank you.
你这是怎么了 So what's with you?
什么 What?
多美好的时刻啊 That was an amazing moment,
你却毫无表情地躺在那里 And you just sat there like y-you didn't even care.
我只是累了 I'm just tired.
我知道这很突然 Look, I know this has been a shock,
我也给了你时间 但已经三个月了 And I'm trying to give you time, but it's been three months.
什么时候你才会 When are you gonna start
为我们小孩的到来而感到高兴 Getting excited about our kids?
怎么了 What?
我无法爱他们 I don't love them.
勒奈特 Lynette.
求你 不要这样看着我 Please. Don't look at me that way.
如果我不跟你说 我会疯掉的 If I can't talk to you about this, then I am in big trouble.
你会烦恼只是因为 这不在我们的预计中 You're just upset because... this wasn't planned.
没有一个孩子是在我们预计中 None of them were planned,
但当得知他们的到来时 But I loved each of our kids
我还是会爱他们 The moment I knew they were coming.
但这一次不一样 It's different this time.
我无法爱这两个小孩 I don't love these babies.
不许再这样说 Stop saying that.
当你把这两个小孩抱在怀里 When you hold them in your arms,
你就会珍惜他们 You will care about these kids.
就像其他孩子一样 Just as much as the others.
好的 Okay.
婚礼当天 The wedding
我有东西留在车上了 里头见 I think I left something in the car. I'll see you inside.
布里 Bree.
奥森会像他从前参加婚礼那样 Orson will drink too much today,
喝很多 like he always does at weddings.
九点钟他就会睡觉 he'll be asleep by 9:00.
九点半在香格里拉酒店和我碰面 Meet me at the Shangrila motel at 9:30.
你不会再放我鸽子 And you won't bail on me again?
我昨晚预定了房间 I booked the room last night.
我已经换了被单 清洗了浴室 I've already changed the sheets and cleaned the bathroom.
吻我 Kiss me.
我们的乖乖女怎么了 What happened to the good girl?
她说 愧疚是幸福的代价 She decided guilt's a small price to pay for happiness.
老实说 我穿比你好看 Frankly, I think it looked better on me.
凯瑟琳 Katherine.
你在这里干什么 What are you doing here?
你可能发现了我最近的脾气有点暴躁 You may have noticed that I've been out of sorts lately,
而我也不知道原因 and I just couldn't understand why.
我是说 不错 我是被我爱的人甩了 I mean, sure, I was dumped by the love of my life,
但不仅仅是如此 But it was more than that.
然后我就想到了 我的朋友 And then it hit me. My friend--
那个毁掉我的生活的人 Who was sort of responsible for my world imploding--
却又从未转移玉步 去关心一下我 Never bothered to cross the street to see how I was doing.
还欠我一个 正式的道歉 Didn't have the... decency to apologize.
我十分十分的 I am very, very--
不 不是在这里 在外面 No, not here. out there.
在礼堂 In the hallway?
在你的婚礼上 In your ceremony.
镇里的人都知道你抢走了我的男人 Everybody in town knows you humiliated me.
我想一个公开道歉应该不为过 I think I deserve a public apology.
在我的婚礼期间 In the middle of my wedding?
我发现了一个很好的时段 就在这里 I found the perfect spot, right here.
在念传道书后 和念 After the reading of ecclesiastes. And right before
我们仅此起誓前 "we've only just begun."
我不会这样做 I am not doing that.
你会的 Yes, you will,
因为我可能会做出一些尴尬的事 Or I will create a scene so ugly
让所有人在你的五十周年纪念日 Your guests will still be talking about it
依然记得 on your golden anniversary.
好吧 Okay.
可我不高兴 But I am not happy about this.
不管怎样 强颜欢笑吧 Aw. try to smile anyway.
没人喜欢脾气暴躁的新娘 Nobody likes a grumpy bride.
我们何不冰释前嫌 Why don't we just get this over with?
能帮我拿下手套吗 Would you mind getting my gloves?
在塑胶套里 They're in the garment bag.
对不起 I'm sorry.
婚礼后再找我算账吧 It's just until after the ceremony.
苏珊 Susan!
从此以后 And from this day forward,
你们都将是彼此的归属 You shall be each other's home.
成为彼此的庇护所 You shall be each other's sanctuary.
苏珊 放我出去 Susan, let me out!
戴上这枚戒指 With this ring,
你我永结同心 I thee wed.
抱歉 我来晚了 错过什么了吗 Sorry I'm late. did I miss anything?
怎么回事 你在这里干什么 What the hell? what are you doing here?
苏珊心里有数 Susan knows.
听着 我不知道你有什么企图 Look, I don't know what you want,
可我心平气和地请你离开 But I'm asking you nicely to leave.
如果你不走 我发誓 And if you don't, so help me god,
我会亲自把你拖出教堂 I will drag you out of this church myself.
抱歉 我 I'm sorry. i...
我只想 I-i just wanted...
我这就走 I'll go.
凯瑟琳 等等 Katherine, wait.
大家好 Hello, everybody.
我只想说些话 I just wanna say something.
别把这段拍进去 Oh, we don't need this on the veo.
麦克再次向我求婚时 When Mike asked me to marry him...Again,
那是我人生中最幸福的一天 It was one of the happiest days of my life.
可对于其她人 But for someone else,
那天她的世界支离破碎 It was the day her whole world fell apart.
我不得不承认 And I have to admit, i...
我没有放在心上 I didn't care.
那一刻 我无比自私 In that moment, I was a selfish person,
于是选择了自己的幸福 And I chose my happiness.
可我想让你们知道 But I want you all to know
因为改变了她的人生轨迹 我真心道歉 That I am truly sorry for changing her path.
而且我希望 And I hope
凯瑟琳·梅菲尔能找到自己的幸福 That katherine mayfair finds happiness
能打从心底里原谅我 And can find it in her heart to forgive me...
重新成为我的朋友 And be my friend again.
希望这样可以了 I hope that helped.
老实说 Honestly...
还不够 It didn't.
丹尼到底去哪了 Where the hell is Danny?
他两小时前就离开了婚礼现场 也不在自己房间 He left the wedding two hours ago and he's not in his room.
他很快就会回家了 He'll be home soon.
那孩子到底怎么了 You know, what has gotten into that kid?
他深夜不归 当众跟女孩吵架 He's staying out late, pickin' fights with girls in public.
-明知道自己不该这样的 -他还只是个孩子 - He knows better than that. - He's a teenager.
去找他去 Well, go look for him.
我们可不能在这里惹是生非了 We can't afford to make waves here.
要装成正常的善良人家 Everyone has to think we are nice, normal people.
是啊 Yeah.
在郊区 要发现罪孽之事并不困难 It's not hard to find sin in the suburbs.
只要往紧闭的门内看进去 Just look behind closed doors,
你就会发现你的邻居们 And you'll find your neighbors
欺骗自己的丈夫 Cheating on their husbands....
(孕妇装) Maternity clothes
憎恨自己的孩子 Resenting their children...
计划报复自己的朋友 Plotting against their friends.
但尽管我们很喜欢谈论 But as much as we like to talk about
人们所做的罪孽之事... The sinful things people do...
我们忘了 罪孽和罪恶 还是不同的 We forget there is a difference between sin...and evil.
不幸的是 总会有人提醒我们 Sadly, there's always someone willing to come along
罪恶的存在 And remind us.